I had been hopeful. I'm not an optimist. I should've known that upon my return to university life come September I would not be greeted by a sea of opportunities, self enrichment and ample young bucks as far as the eye could see. You know what I was greeted by?
A sea of vag.
Seriously. Chicks everywhere. They do not lie in those statistics people, the average woman is way more interested in becoming learned then the average man.
Even worse then that, I had forgotten that I attend the University of Victoria. Three to one female to male ratio and I swear to god two out of three of those women are totally bangable. I would even go as far to say 2.5 are bangable.
So here I found myself, optimism dwindling, surrounded by legions of every kind of vagina holder you can find. Tall ones, short ones, skinny ones, curvy ones, blonde ones, brunette ones, deadlocked ones, pants that aren't really pants but rather tights wearing ones. You want 'em, Uvic gots 'em. Might as well be a brothel were the only currency is charm.
From what I hear from my fellow students, most universities are like this. Naturally a place full of young people will be full of young women who maintain themselves well enough to get laid on a bimonthly basis.
Now, don't get me wrong here people. I ain't afraid of a little competition. Even if we exclude my physical appearance (if you could ignore something this smokin', that is) I've still got a one up on the average dong-chaser plainly because I go after the things I want. I will repeat it again: shit only happens if you make it happen, and young bitches just can't seem to get that through their head. The real problem here ladies and gentlemen is an ample lack of pickins.
I cleverly forgot that I very rarely find "ample young bucks" attractive. We all know I like 'em thirty, over educated and under employed. Not early twenties, 5 year plans and 11 yr old pubes for chest hair.
I'm living in a trashy lesbians paradise, hoards of experimental beautiful girls and a serious lack of male competition. But alas, as much sense as it would make, I am not a rug-muncher. I'm just a straight girl with more balls then your average dick.
So what do you do when your stuck in institution that provides you with more work then it does tail?
Harvest your resources. That acquaintance you never hooked up with because of another romance? Harvest it. That ex who you broke up only because you were leaving for the summer? Harvest it. That exchange student in your sociology class with little to no vocabulary but a lot of assets ifyouknowwhatimean. Moissonnez-le. Stick to what you know people, it's a big scary world out there and you need to hit something other then the books.
'DILF' of the Week
So aside from the obvious good qualities (tall, handsome, is in a vampire show that usually doesn't suck) Alexander Skarsgård who plays Eric Northman in HBO's True Blood is a raging DILF because he is essentially the male version of me. We're both super Aryan and we're both totally bangable, 'nuff said.
