The Man Period.
It exists people, so help me god it exists. Ladies, you know what I'm talking about, the sudden mood swings, the abrupt irritability, the marijuana (or meat) cravings - everything that afflicts us gals during 'that time of the month' but without reason. If Bio 30 taught me anything I know that men do not have 'seasonal' hormones, there's no biological reason for them to be pissy one minute and fine the next.
Yeah yeah dudes, I know what your thinking "even if it does exist (which it doesn't) only serves you ladies right".
I'm not pretending that pms isn't the stuff of nightmares. You're not alone in your fear, I don't like the fact I turn into a irrational blood thirsty monster according to the moon cycle either. But here's the thing gents, the female period is predictable. It happens the same time every month. The man period (or manopause in those older gentlemen) can strike at anytime. Most often when the individual not being afflicted by pms (i.e. me) is in good spirits, and then you whiny non-vaginal bitches have to swoop in and ruin my good mood.
You know how often good moods happen to me people? Weigh my love of sarcasm alongside my natural cynicism and take a good guess.
Give me a cane and a medical degree and I'm practically you-know-who. A good mood should be nurtured, cherished even - not crushed by this gigantic biological conundrum like a dorito under the ass of the two-ton teen.
I here by sanction that men, like women, have the privilege of being totally irrational for up to a seven day period once a month. But, must make clear of this time period so women, like men, can fuck right off till it's all over.
I'm all about gender equality people.
'DILF of the Week'
In honor of the Calgary Folk Fest (which I am more then stoked for) I present to you, The Avett Brothers. Yeah who knows if they're really 'DILF' material. But the point is, they know how to rock a beard.
What's sexy my friends? Body hair and music.
But especially body hair.
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